Remember who sets the boundaries and expectations

Being a mom is tough. Once the kiddos get past the adorable snuggle stage, they’re a little more manageable. When it comes to feeding themselves and what not, that part gets easier. But just when you think you’re going to get a chance to catch your breath, you hit the remembering stuff stage.

Some parents sign their kids up for stuff from the day they’re born, thus entering the remembering stuff stage much earlier. Whatever, you do you. I, however, was happy to hold off on getting here until it was unavoidable. The remembering stuff stage comes eventually. And it’s a good thing to have kids involved in stuff. I am absolutely 100% in favor, but having involved kids does equal a ton of work.

Remembering becomes a full time job

The task of making sure everyone has everything at the right time all the time typically falls on the mom. (I’m not saying do-er Dads don’t exist, but they are more the exception than the rule). Remembering which kid is going to which practice and remembering who is going to get them there and who is going to pick them up is one thing. Add to that, remembering all the stuff for the fundraiser(s). Also, reminding kids of papers and homework that need to come home from school or go back to school. There’s remembering to make sure meals and snacks are stocked and ready for seven different things on seven different days. There’s making sure uniforms are clean and ready. There’s waking up one kid at one time and one at another. And on and on and on…

Now I’m supposed to remember one more thing???

So, when the kid comes with the great idea that her friends have about this fun thing they’ve dreamt up, you get to remember to ask the right questions too. I momentarily forgot that I am the parent in the room when my kid called me asking about an upcoming sleepover. Thankfully, a conversation with her aunt as soon as I got off the phone with her got me back on track as to remembering that I can and should ask questions. And, more importantly, EXPECT answers. So by the time I got home and the kid came to me again I was ready.

So you don’t have to remember one more thing I’ve compiled the following list. It includes questions that I said needed answers before I could make an informed decision on the matter:

  • Who will be the adult chaperoning this event? (Notice I did not ask “Will there be…?) This sets the expectation right off the bat.
  • Does the adult chaperoning the event plan to stay all night?
  • Name each person who will be attending this event.
  • How will you be feeding yourselves? Who will pay for/get/prepare food?
  • When does it start?
  • When does it end?

That’s all I’ve got right now. There may have been more, I can’t remember. When the kids come with their many “good ideas” if you remember only one thing, it’s that you’re the parent and as such your job is to set boundaries and expectations.